Sunday, January 10, 2010

What's my story?

>-----Original Message-----
>From: Kate *****
>Sent: Wednesday, January 14, 2004 11:53 AM
>To: Matthew *****
>Subject: RE: HI!!
>
>Thangs are great. I'm swamped at work. Took yesterday off to receive 2
>deliveries-a new king bed and a frig. Worked in the garden, walked the dog,
>and totally enjoyed the warm weather. Holidays were delightful.
>What's your story?

What's my story, you ask? Well, at the age of 5 I was living in a home for the mentally insane. My father was a doctor in love with his patient, but like many love affairs in insane asylums, the romance was not meant to last. He moved on, leaving my mother pregnant with me and my evil twin, Horus. We grew up in an orphanage. Horus was always trying to do evil by helping nasty old ladies to cross the street and becoming a lackey for the local YMCA. I, for my part, decided to take a more mundane path. At the age of 8, I built a ray gun that would destroy the moon, which I have proven is the cause of evil insanity. That moon, it's so bright at night, keeping me awake...awake...awake. For some reason this upset the authorities. Something about leaving the Earth helpless at the mercy of huge moon debris, I think, as if that matters to me. So, the nefarious forces of the ATF intervened, taking my ray gun away to use for their own selfish purposes. At that moment, I set out on a life that would allow me to one day rule the world and destroy evil everywhere. I've almost completed my plan twice in the past 10 years, only to be thwarted by some super hero or another. If I have to hear the words, "I'm Batman!" hoarsely uttered by that bat brained fool one more time, I'm going to go crazy myself. He will be the first to go when I am King of Everything, and then I will eliminate my nemesis, Horus where ever he is! ::maniacal laugh::

As for this week, I've just been busy here at work...really busy too. Lots going on. I'm excited about going to Vegas in a couple weeks! woohoo!

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